Hurling ~ Monkeys ~ and the such....

If someone tells you right off that they've been hit by a bus .. and you still chose to send them a pic... well then, that's on you...


DMarti5332:hi there
DMarti5332:you there?
DMarti5332: where are you?
Marebytes: i was hit by a bus
Marebytes: im sure the monkeys are behind it some how
DMarti5332: that's terrible! did you survive?
Marebytes: my spleen fell out
DMarti5332: sounds awfully messy
Marebytes: twas
DMarti5332: are you all back together?
Marebytes: the monkeys laughed - the bastards !
DMarti5332: well I didn't
Marebytes: sure sure sure
Marebytes: thats what the all say,,,but soon,,the monkeys will get to you !!!
DMarti5332: nah.....i don't generally rejoice at other's discomfort. are you ok?
Marebytes: yes but i still cant go to the primate house
Marebytes: its too painful for me
Marebytes: THOSE BASTARDS!!!!!!
DMarti5332: where WOULD you like to go?
Marebytes: hmmmm....anywhere,,just to be free from them
DMarti5332: ok. where aren't they?
Marebytes: thats just it.... i think im free
Marebytes: and they find me... theyre devious bastards
DMarti5332: don't stop trying..never stop trying
Marebytes: its just wont end
DMarti5332: possibly, but we can't give up
Marebytes: i have
Marebytes: i must live with them
DMarti5332: why?
Marebytes: theyre wicked
Marebytes: and evil,,just like the clowns
DMarti5332: oh. clowns
Marebytes: yes,,,,effin clowns
DMarti5332: that could be trouble
Marebytes: nothing but trouble,,i swear,,theyre in this together
DMarti5332: it's entirely likely
DMarti5332:i just sent you mail
DMarti5332: did you get my picture?
Marebytes: yes and i must say...i laughed, i cried, i brought up my dinner
DMarti5332: i had no idea i would have so profound an effect on you
Marebytes: yes,,much like the first time when i was 14 and saw "The Exorcist"
DMarti5332: i suppose i owe you an appology, then
Marebytes: its just that,,well,,the idea,,,thats it was so real......
DMarti5332: is real a problem ?
Marebytes: well,did ya see the movie??
DMarti5332: yes
Marebytes: didnt it scare you....
DMarti5332: no. i was older when i saw it. it startled me. a bit
Marebytes: the reason it scared me ...was...something so terrifying was possibly out there in the world, somewhere
Marebytes: and that's just how i felt when i downloaded that file
DMarti5332: am i that terrifying?
Marebytes: TERRFYING?
DMarti5332: well, i am out here, in the world. and not very far away
Marebytes: oh,,god,,that reminds me,,i gotta let the cats in......
DMarti5332: don''t call me "oh god"
Marebytes: so..let me guess... you had a dog as a child
DMarti5332: no, actually. i didn't
Marebytes: that was probably best
DMarti5332: do you think so?
Marebytes: for everyone involved
DMarti5332: why?
Marebytes: hey..look at it from the dogs point of view for a minute
Marebytes: stop being so god damn one sided

Storage Needs

N59Heavy: hi there,I'm Rudy, do pilots turn you on ?
Marebytes: have you lost it?
N59Heavy: lost it ?
N59Heavy: never had it....
Marebytes you sick little monkey
Marebytes ive known fellas like you....
Marebytes: dont make me come over there
N59Heavy: you do ?...I doubt that
Marebytes: cuz i'll find out which side your bread is buttered on,,, and we'll make toast
N59Heavy: November, Five, Nine, Heavy....request vector to Cooper top pad...ILS approach.....over .......Know what that means ?....bet ya don't.
Marebytes it's landing calls
N59Heavy: right !!!.....smart
Marebytes: : ) yup - sharp as a bowling ball
N59Heavy: cool.......hope you never get a ride with us..
Marebytes: heheheheh yup,,youre right. I am so sure you sure dont want me there
Marebytes: with the toast situation and all
N59Heavy: most of my passengers don't know they're there......toast ?............orange marmalade
Marebytes: butter !!!!! BUTTER ONLY DAMMIT !!!!!!
Marebytes: WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE????SPECIAL ????........WHY I OUGHTA.........
Marebytes: ok,,im better now....
Marebytes: Can I ask you one question????
N59Heavy: Yes?
Marebytes: Rudy,,,do you take it up the ass...?
Marebytes: cause i have a small sofa that i need to put into storage
N59Heavy: perhaps we should end this conversation.......
N59Heavy: think Lithium
Marebytes: youre not the first to tell me this and im sure you wont be the last
N59Heavy: my kinda girl !!
Marebytes: but,,,hey,,,its not a big sofa
Marebytes: its not a sofa bed or anything
Marebytes: more like a love seat
N59Heavy: we all take a seat from time to time...don't we ?
Marebytes: i have,,,more times than i care to remember
N59Heavy: ever been sedated ? prostrated ? masturbated ?
N59Heavy: I digress
Marebytes: all of the above
Marebytes: once,,,in that exact order
N59Heavy: <---proficient with chop sticks
Marebytes: have you ever filled an enema bag with Kool_aid
Marebytes: and let it rip?
N59Heavy: Cherry or Orange ?....coolaide
Marebytes: Grape...only grape,,,,,less explaining
Marebytes: so,,,what do you say,,about the sofa..... ????
Marebytes: can ya help me out
N59Heavy: what do you need ?.......help moving it to the street ?
Marebytes: no,,a place to store it
N59Heavy: what day is trash pick-up ?
Marebytes: i dont wanna trash it
N59Heavy: what do you want to do with it...do tell
Marebytes: I wanna keep it stored , in your anal cavity

Multi-tasking

27PHBasil: hey, whatcha doing?
27PHBasil: I'm folding a load of laundry, downloading drivers for the computer, and trying to talk to you :-)

Marebytes: and jerking off the neighbors dog with your free hand ?

27PHBasil: LOL

 Marebytes: Been there.. but then  the first dog started to howl in a good way, a crowd formed at the door and then my hand cramped up

27PHBasil: I guess I should go

Marebytes: excellent

Shaved??

Wouldn't you have given up after the first sentence?
_____________________________________________

Wildeve500: are you shaved?
Marebytes: i shave my back
Wildeve500: whats your favorite position?
Marebytes: face down in a bowl of pudding
Wildeve500: Sorry to bother you!!
Wildeve500: I didn't mean to be rude, I'm sorry!
Marebytes: yes, you did
Marebytes: and perhaps one day i'll get over it
Marebytes: but not now
Marebytes:: not this soon
Wildeve500: Well I apolagize for what its worth
Marebytes:that and 75 cents will get me a cup of coffee

babeball season!

It just still never ceases to amaze me what some guys will put up with if they even think they have a chance:

jonesscott99: hi, feel like chatting with a sexy guy?
marebytes: i feel like hitting you with a bat
jonesscott99: ouch, that doesn't sound like fun
marebytes: well, perhaps not for you
marebytes: but my day would be complete
jonesscott99: ok, where are you going to hit me?
marebytes: knees... shins...back of the head maybe
marebytes: then we can chat?
jonesscott99: ok, I'll tuff it out
marebytes : if you're capable and you'd still like to
jonesscott99 : swing away
jonesscott99 : do I get to swing back, or just take it like a man?
jonesscott99 : have a nice day